Spring?

Tentatively, without making any sudden movements that might scare it away for another 2 weeks, I am quietly celebrating the arrival of an early Canadian springtime.  Yes, early.  Normally, the middle of April is the melting of snow, but who can really say what normal weather is these days?  (yaaaaaaay)

What's on the menu for this (spring)?

1.  Chickens:  After a several year hiatus, we're bringing chicken back, and it's going to be smaller and better than ever!  Instead of a flock of 400, which was a challenge to manage, I'm starting with about 150-200.  I've built a chick brooder, which I will post a picture of soon, when it's painted and ready to go.  I've got some very specific plans for this years flock, namely that I'm going to build a breeding flock of hens who will hopefully then supply me with eggs and babies throughout the next season.  I've picked the Buff Orpington as my Heritage breed of choice, since they grow large, they are not jerks (more on that later) and they will brood their eggs to hatch babies.  It takes the Buff-O about 18-20 weeks to reach it's full size, and it's sexual maturity, which is quite a bit longer than the "normal" broiler breeds, but here's the secret...caponizing.

Caponizing is when you take the male (rooster) around six weeks of age, max of 14 weeks, and you castrate him.  It's no secret that testosterone makes meat taste gamey and tough, so cattle producers will always castrate a male cow, unless they want him to be a bull.  He'll grow up without his oysters, and his meat will be nice and quite edible.  He will not be aggressive, nor will he be fertile.  The same goes with chickens, but the procedure is somewhat more challenging, since the boys "parts" are actually inside the bird.  You have to make a small incision and pull them out.  It is as difficult as it sounds, but the meat stays tender and flavorful, and the chicken still gets to a nice size in about 20 weeks.  Since it costs a lot to process a chicken, every pound of weight makes it worth more to sell.  No sense raising a bunch of tiny 3 lb chickens and paying $5 each to process, instead I will raise a smaller number of 7 or 8 lb birds, which are nearly turkey sized.  I have a feeling that there is a hidden market for this kind of chicken, particularly among immigrants who might have actually eaten caponized chicken before.  Instead of a turkey, why not eat a large tasty pastured chicken?

2.  Bottle calves:  Originally I wanted to buy a gaggle of weaned calves, and feed them on my free grass for six months or so, then sell them again for some sweet, sweet profit.  Unfortunately, prices for the young calves have never been higher, and I run a serious risk of making absolutely no money at all if the price of the larger cattle falls.  Since I am not interesting in running a gambling operation, I've decided to go another way.  Bottle calves are babies that, for whatever reason, have been separated from their mother at a very young age.  You can buy them for a decent price, but you take a risk; they might die on you, and they also take a lot of work to raise.  Assuming you buy some that aren't going to die, you have to feed them a milk replacer.  The most efficient way that I have discovered is called "acidified milk", and you basically mix a few days worth of milk, add some formic acid to bring it to a pH of 4.5 (so it doesn't spoil), and let the calf drink when it wants to, without adding heat to it.  This is becoming popular, and in my opinion is waaaaay easier than the well known method of bottle feeding fresh milk replacer twice a day by hand.  You do have to stir the milk somehow, because it does settle.  I plan to have four bottle calves at some point, and raise them to full size. Then, I will either breed them if they are female, or sell the meat if they are steers (castrated males).  That will take about 20 months to complete.

3.  A cottage and a barn:  I've been slowing working on my small shed, it just needs some shingles on the roof, and a better door and it will be quite useful.  I really want to build a multi-purpose barn/workshop/garage, and this will be the year to to it.  My wife wants me to build a very small old-fashioned cottage that you could sit and read in, or play music, or nap, or escape from the world for a bit.  By winter I ought to have a covered frame and waterproof roof done.  I can work on the inside over the winter, since we plan to put a small wood burning stove inside.

4.  Small but productive garden:  As though all of the above wasn't enough, I would like to build my garden area up, making some permanent pathways with gravel, and planting some peas, carrots, beans, and some pumpkins.  

5.  Part time job:  Oh, and I have a part time job working at a homeless shelter.

How to buy cars (for filthy rich peoples)

    Hi everybody!  I thought I would give you some useful tips on how to spend as much money as possible on vehicles, especially for you lottery winners out there.

1.  Buy new:  Buy the newest vehicle you can, making sure that you purchase every "upgrade" available.  Wipers that turn on when it rains?  Oh yeah!  Now you can save your self the strenuous task of flicking that switch when the first drops of water hits the window.
NEVER:  Buy a good quality used vehicle more then three years old, but less than 12.  By then, most of the "hit" in value has occurred, and you'll just end up saving money, which you will then be forced to spend on something useless, like food.  You will also pay less for insurance, and then what will happen to the children of your broker?  How will he pay for them to attend Harvard?  They might have to settle for Brown, and it's all your fault.

2.  Insure it against everything:  Giraffe attack?  It could happen!  Solar flares?  That could scorch the paint!  Always get glass coverage, and hail coverage.  Your $65,000 truck needs to be protected against all perils, and the payments will suck that dirty, dirty money from your overflowing bank account.
NEVER:  Insure only against liability.  That's for suckers.  Most places charge a pittance for liability only, and who would want that?  After all, we should be...

3.  Drive like an @$$hole:  Tickets are like showers of secret jealous adoration for your matchless driving ability.  You should feel honored to send your $$$ to the coffers of our benevolent benefactors, but make sure you don't ever change your driving habits, it makes you look weak, and you will be eaten by bears.
NEVER:  Drive defensively.  That $65k truck will basically flatten every vehicle in sight, while you nap in luxury in the driver's seat, texting your other rich friend's butlers.  Besides, more tickets, means higher insurance, and your broker can finally buy that swimming pool!

4.  Borrow to make your purchase:  Even the filthiest of the rich should be borrowing money they don't have.  You can always pay it back tomorrow, and tomorrow never comes!  You can't lose!
NEVER: Pay cash for a well researched used vehicle.  You might accidentally touch something a poor person touched, and then you will have to shave your fingerprints off.  Again.

Lastly..

5.  Do not fix your own vehicle:  Take it to the dealer!  He will always charge you the most, and keep your vehicle forever, which means you can just drive your butler's car.  Wear gloves though, you don't want to catch poverty from the steering wheel.
NEVER: Learn any basic mechanical skills, like oil changes and changing a tire.  Always pay someone to do those things, so you can establish your position amongst the ultra-weathly.  Lester McMonneyBaggs tried to do an oil change, and he got DIRT under his fingernails.  Imagine his face when he went for his weekly manicure!  That could be YOU!

*****So, this is intended to be a humorous how-to for people trying to save money on buying used cars.  My family and I have saved thousands by following the NEVER advice above.  Just today, unfortunately, my beloved farm truck died on the highway, and had to be towed back home.  The head gasket gave out, and coolant (mixed with oil) found it's way to the roadway.  After a short, but cold wait, we got towed back.  Since I need a truck for the farm, I get to buy another one!  I set myself a limit of $2000, and within a few hours I found a good used Chevy for $1700.  It's not a luxury vehicle, but I'm not a luxury kind of guy.  I don't mind a little rust, it is a farm truck after all.  Best of all?  The insurance is $380.  Per year.  The truck that just died lasted me about 6.5 years, and I paid about $4500 for it.
      I also plan to keep that old truck, and put a new head gasket on it.  It really needs more work than that, but I only want to get it back to running condition, then I will use it around the farm.  If the new truck goes kaput, then I will have a back up!
Remember "Two is one, and one is none"
If you have no back up, then when the machine/device/item breaks, you will be out of luck.
Some thoughts from a poor country hick who would like my bank account to be overflowing with money NOT spent on vehicles!

"Don't thank me"

Today is Remembrance Day, November the 11th.  If you are like me, you will undoubtedly spend some time thinking about death, war, and the millions of young men whose lives have been snuffed out by armed conflicts in the 20th Century.

Many will say "Thank a soldier, they're the reason that you have the freedom you enjoy today!" or "Let's remember those who died for your freedom."  and maybe put a picture of a poppy as their Facebook profile picture.  I have no doubt that these people are sincere, and truly grateful for their lives, just as I am grateful to live in the relative peace that I enjoy now.

Many years ago, I once wore a military uniform.  For 8 years, I was part of Canada's Reserve Forces, although I worked full time for a few years.  I frequently had people approach me and tell me that they "appreciate what I do", and I wanted to say,
"Don't thank me, I haven't done anything!"
Just because I wore a multicolored uniform with badges and a hat does not make me a hero.  No man becomes a hero because of his job.  Do you want to know what my role in the military was?  I filled out paperwork, and sat in front of a computer all day.  It was boring, and I realized early that I'm not fit for a desk job.

On the other hand, my grandfather Manny volunteered with the Royal Canadian Air Force in the 40's, becoming part of an air crew.  His aircraft would have been responsible for flying across the English channel, and finding military targets to destroy.  Many of these would have been in occupied France, and many more would have been in Germany.  Ultimately, the efforts of many millions were successful, and the Nazi regime was destroyed, although Manny was eventually shot down and captured before the final end.

World War 1 and 2 ended with 100+ million people dead, and many millions more wounded and homeless.  The monetary cost of war was astronomical, and there isn't a government still around that isn't STILL paying the debt that was incurred.  In the US, the government used the war efforts to enact an Income Tax, expand the use of paper money, and force millions of young men to join the military, and ultimately die in muddy and frozen trenches.  These are not good things, this is not what "freedom" looks like.  Yet, we call these the "good wars", and talk about how "we would be speaking German now" if not for these horrible, costly wars.

World War 1 started with a very small land dispute, and turned into a raging world conflict, and World War 2 was prompted when a failed painter took advantage of a demoralized German population to seize power and enact his twisted vision of a perfect world.  Many don't realize that Germany had been economically crushed by the Versailles Treaty, and had been paying millions of dollars in gold to France, allegedly to "repay" the damage caused by WW1.  The German population was starving, and their money was worthless.  They wanted a solution, and Hitler provided it.

Of course, once the war had begun, it needed to be stopped.  Terrible things were done by both the Allies, and the Nazis.  Entire cities filled with innocent people were killed by bombing, including two Japanese cities where 250,000 civilians were murdered by atomic weapons, when Japan was already on the brink of surrender.  We found out later that the Americans simply wanted to see what the bombs would do to a city...and today, there are enough nukes around to destroy all life on earth 10 times over.

Was this good?  No.  Nothing good ever comes of war, just death and misery.  No one really wins, but you better believe that there are losers!  Nevertheless, I recognize something about those who volunteered to fight.  They really thought they were doing something good.  They wanted to help, although I suspect many of them were simply thrilled by the excitement of "War".

I'm not going to talk about the Afghanistan war, or Korea, or Vietnam, or peacekeeping missions.  I'm only going to say this.  War is hell, and those who see it will find that a piece of that hell still lives inside them.  The wars of the 20th century were fought for Europe and Asia, but everyone ultimately suffered.  We are not more free because of war, we are simply alive, and grateful to be so.

To those who died, I will say, "I'm sorry you are dead".  To those who lived, I will say, "I am glad you survived".  We will never know what the world might have been without war, but I know this; we will soon forget about the horror, the death, disease and misery, and the world will eventually be at war again.  We should avoid this at all costs, but we won't.  I just hope that my children, and yours don't become victims like so many have before us.  If you remember anything, remember that!

The Untouchables

Article - The Untouchables

By Adam L Schneider

            In a far corner of the world, you stand on a crowded street, barely a street in fact, and more a smear of dirt buried beneath the jostling throngs of human bodies heading in every direction.  So many people!  More than a billion people live in India, and they all seem to be on this street with you.  As you scan the faces, you see that there are many different shades of skin color.  India is home to 25 separate provinces, each with it’s own language.  Your eyes are drawn to a very dark skinned man, hauling a crude wheelbarrow filled with refuse.  The crowd seems to part around him, as if he were somehow surrounded by an invisible forcefield.  Another dark skinned man is seen in a doorway, holding a piece of leather.  Your eyes meet quickly, and he looks away.  His wife is a shy silhouette behind him, not daring to even appear in public.  As you continue, you see many more people performing menial tasks, dirty chores, and even cleaning up human waste.  They all seem to have very dark skin, and no one will go near them.  It’s as if they were…untouchable. 

Many of these “untouchables”, or Dalit (as they are known in India) end up as labourers, leatherworkers, butchers, garbage collectors, and historically, they were segregated from the regular population to the point that no one would dare even brush against them by accident.

            Today, the government in India has enacted many laws to protect these people, and the caste system is fading into the past.  Dalits today hold 17% of India’s jobs, and they’ve been elected to political office on every level, repeatedly.  Great job India!  Now, pack up your bags, and we’ll fly back to North America.  It just so happens to be Sunday, and, what a coincidence, there is a big, beautiful church right next door to the airport!  You’re just in time for the morning service, and you’re even dressed for the occasion, with your buttoned up collar shirt, and pressed slacks.  Some one even polished your wingtip shoes while you were on the airplane!  Boy, that Westjet sure thinks of everything.

            As the service ends, you still feel disoriented from the plane ride, almost as though you were still back on that narrow crowded street in rural India, trying to press your way through the crushing mass of people.  You briefly remember the Dalits you saw, and you say a thankful prayer that there is no “caste” system in your hometown.  As the congregation stands to leave, most are joking and laughing, talking about plans, or telling their friends about the past week.  Not everyone gets up, though.  A few people are still sitting, not talking, or laughing, or doing anything at all.  Most of these people will wait for everyone else to leave, then slip out the door, nearly invisible.  The only reason you noticed them, is that the look on their face seems strangely familiar…like you’ve seen people like that somewhere else. 

            Every church has them.  The “untouchables”.  They might be socially awkward, shy, angry, or they might be strange looking, or even downright ugly.  Parents whisper to their children, “Don’t go near Mr Laughstooloud, he might be dangerous!”, and even the ushers seem to be uncomfortable greeting them.  Once in a while, a brave soul will make a point to say, “Hey, how’re ya doin!” in a syrupy voice, shake their hand, utter some banal phrase like, “Boy it’s cold out there today, huh?”, and then make a run for it.  That’s fine for starters, but then what?  This person didn’t come to shake random people’s hands and wax on about the weather, they came because they NEEDED SOMETHING, and the Body of Jesus Christ, the Believers, the Church, seemed to be a place to get it! 

            A few minutes ago, I got a text from a friend of mine who is the very definition of “untouchable”.  It’s his birthday today, and I’m the only one who remembered.  His texts are childish, and riddled with spelling errors, but he has a brain injury, so that’s no surprise.  I’m often awakened by a text, or rarely, a phone call at 2 or 3 in the morning, where he tells me how sick he is of life, and how he wants to “let go”.  If you saw this guy at church, you would never know he was depressed, he hides it beneath awkward humour, lame jokes, and constant laughter.  Most people roll their eyes, and just walk away, if they don’t simply avoid or ignore him. 

            I decided long ago, that this man was my friend no matter what.  No matter how many times he woke me up with late night text messages, or if I could see food on his teeth, or dead skin in his beard when he talks, I’ve decided that he’s my friend, and deserves my attention.  When I’m at church, I make a point to have a conversation with him, short, but personal.  I text him back when he sends a message (not always right away).  I remember details about his life, the girl he likes, the things he does for fun, and when he says, “I love you bro!”, I say it right back, because that’s what friends do, they share the love that Jesus showed to us!

            I once thought of my friend as “my little project”, but I’ve grown beyond that.  Now, he’s just my friend.  I know that Jesus sent him my way, and that’s fine with me!  I asked for it, after all.  I prayed to God, “Oh Lord, let me serve you!”, and I put my hands down, turned around, and there was my ministry, right in front of me.  Did you think that God was going to send you to Africa?  Thailand?  Mexico?  Or, are you willing to find that one person, the “untouchable”, and become a missionary without leaving your chair?

            Here’s what you need to do:  Stop pretending that you’re too awesome to talk to these people, sit your hiney down in the chair next to them, and introduce yourself.  When they talk, listen and ask questions.  If someone you know stops by and interrupts, tell them you’re busy!  Your new friend needs your attention, and you’re going to give it, or you've failed the first mission God gave ever gave you, you know the one that goes “Love your Neighbour”?  You don’t need to give them your phone number and a house key, but next week, when you see them again, greet them by name, and do the same thing you did before.  You can only do what you can, but do something!

            Maybe it will never happen, but if everyone in church made a point to make friends with a stranger, to get to know newcomers, or to make friends with that guy whose beard looks like it might actually contain a bee’s nest, there would be no untouchables in church, and there would be far less pride and arrogance in His Body.  

Life Lessons from my new job

When you think philosophy, great wisdom, and deep understanding of life, what do you see yourself doing?  I'm sure most of you would picture yourself sitting at the feet of a wizened old monk, soaking in the 1,000 year old nuggets of spiritual wisdom falling from his sun-baked lips?  Or maybe you see yourself taking a 3 day trek into the Amazon jungle to converse with the native, ponder life, and maybe lick a few of those toads, (you know, for science).
Well, I bet the last place you would imagine finding the meaning of life is while pouring a concrete garage pad, or cutting plywood pieces to make a mold for someone's retaining wall.  Grasshopper, let me enlighten you.
PRELUDE
Over this last year, we have been struggling to pay bills, and of course, the banks were no help.  Even though we don't have much debt, it's all very short term, and needs to be rolled into a proper mortgage.  Unfortunately, we don't have a "standard" home, and it's tough to get a mortgage on a mobile home.  It didn't help that my credit rating has taken a hit, because of some "interesting times" (as the Chinese proverb would call it) earlier this year.  The only option I have to improve my credit rating is to pay all of my bills fully, on time, and wait for it to go up.  Since we have absolutely no savings, I decided that I needed to work a part-time job.  We needed to have a couple thousand dollars just stashed away.  I had a minimum wage job for a couple of months, before I decided that my time was worth more than $11/hr.  It occurred to me that with the Great Alberta Flood only a few months behind us, there would be a need for laborers to clean up the many thousands of destroyed homes and businesses, and I was correct!  Not only that, but the construction trades have been exploding with work, and are desperate for workers.  So, I answered an ad on Kijiji, and literally, the next day, I was at work!
As a farmer, I have some limited experience with construction materials, especially wood.  I've use concrete and plaster for some projects, so I figured I would do ok.  The company I've worked for for 3 days does "form work, and flat work", which is construction-speak for walls, and floors.

LESSON 1 - SHOW UP
When I responded to the ad, the foreman emailed me an address and a time.  That's it.  So, at 8 am, I arrived at the address, and found a guy in a Bobcat, and immediately he directed me to work raking gravel.  We worked for about 12 hours that day, and during the course of the day, I learned that the foreman had asked his co-worker "Did Adam show up?  Was he on time?  Does he have a car?"  When he learned the answers, he was AMAZED, and I was amazed that he was amazed.  Why would it be amazing that I showed up?
Anyone who has/does work in the trades already knows the answer, but for the rest of you, allow me to give you enlightenment.  Unlike in the office world, construction workers and laborers are notoriously unreliable.  Men routinely fail to report for work, and don't bother calling, or giving a reason.  Just yesterday, my co-worker told me "We got a new guy starting today", and sure enough, he did NOT show up.  We found out later, that he was in some sort of legal trouble, and I found the entire situation to be quite amusing.  I just couldn't believe that someone would just...not be there when there was $23/hr waiting for them.

LESSON 2 - BE READY
My experience with concrete before this week consisted of filling some post-holes, and plastering a ferro-cement water tank.  When I was 18, I helped build a sidewalk.  So, in other words, pretty much nothing.  Despite that, when I arrived at the site, I had every hand tool I owned, steel-toed boots, hard hat, and a huge lunch.  After 1/2 hr, I was loaning tools to the two experienced guys, who had left some important items at another site.  It was immensely satisfying to say "Oh, I've got one of those, let me get it for you!".
Here's the bald truth: I had run out and purchased a bunch of these tools the day before, just in case.  I had never worn a hard hat, nor used a chalk-line.  My boots were brand new, and my tool-belt fresh off the shelf.  Despite that, when I stepped out, I looked ready, and I felt ready.  No one had to tell me to wear proper gear, or bring proper tools.

LESSON 3 - DO SOMETHING, EVEN IF IT'S WRONG
Yes, grasshopper, this is the trickiest step.  There is a saying in Swahili, "It is easier to ask forgiveness than permission".  When I showed up, I was so green, you could have used me as the background of a new Star Wars movie.  I was aware of some basic facts, like, concrete is hard, nails go pointy-end down, don't hammer your thumb, etc, but there are all kinds of things I was completely ignorant of, and more than once I felt like a complete numbskull.  None the less, I watched intently every single time the experienced guys did anything at all.  When there was any kind of task that looked like it needed to be done, I jumped in.  A couple times the foreman had to say "No, it's ok, I'll do that", which is a polite way of saying "You're going to screw it up, dummy." I still jumped in, each time.  Eventually, they trusted me with some tasks that were more advanced, like hand-floating the concrete, vibrating, and cutting plywood forms.
The second day, the boss left me on my own, with instructions to strip some wood off the concrete on a house basement.  It was very physical work, and I was already tired from the day before.  I accidentally chipped a small piece off of a driveway in my efforts to dislodge a stubborn piece of rebar.  Rather than hide it, I just said, "Yeah, that was me."  The site foreman made an angry face, shook his head, but...that was it.  I offered to repair it (right, with my sooper skillz), and apologized, but there wasn't really anything else to be done.  I owned my mistake, and offered to make it right.  Take that!

SUMMARY
Lesson 1 - I cannot emphasize how important this is.  When a promise exits your lips, such as "I will be there at 8 am", your physical body had better be there at 8 am, or better yet, 7:50!  Your reputation in this world is more valuable than your skills.  Anyone who has ever called a plumber will agree, a man who keeps his word is pretty rare.  If you can't make it, CALL!  Give an alternate time, and then be early for the next week.  You could be the most skilled concrete-man in the world, able to hand float a statue of Michelangelo, or power-trowel a floor using only one hand, but if you are unreliable, then you are useless.  Simple as that.
SHOW UP

Lesson 2 - Did you know that Youtube has 18 videos showing you how to replace the brake pads on a late model Toyota Corolla? There are probably 600 videos on basic construction techniques, like "How to hammer a piece of wood to another piece of wood, using a large metal object with a flat spot, commonly called a 'hammer'."  If I hadn't been at least partially aware of basic construction techniques and terminology, I probably would have been completely useless, instead of just partially useless.  I further "cemented" (see what I did there?) my usefulness by having all kinds of inexpensive, yet very handy tools, like a hammer, belt, and putting them into action when they were needed.
BE READY

Lesson 3 - On day 1, the foreman of our small, ragtag team had a little job on the side.  Nothing big, just pouring 2,000 square feet of concrete.  Did I mention that we had already worked a full day?  Right.  Every single task that I was asked to do was completely new to me.  The foreman kept a steady stream of commands going, "Lift the rebar, tap the edges, spray the concrete, hammer this peg down, get me a sandwich!" And I was literally tripping over my boots to keep up, at least at first.  After the second hour, I was doing all of the above, without being asked.  When I saw a task, I tried to do it.  The two guys I worked with seemed very impressed, not with my sooper skillz, but with the fact that I DID something, even if it was fairly useless.  We all knew that they could have done 95% of the work without me, but that 5% made a difference.  Concrete is an unforgiving master, caring not for your schedule.  When it hardens, it cannot be "unhardened".  I allowed these guys to concentrate on the skilled tasks, while I handled the dummy work.  We got the job done, and I earned a crisp plastic $100 bill.  Yeah, we have plastic money here in Canada.  It has a little window in it too, you can see through it.
DO SOMETHING

Is this a complete list?  No.  You also need to have an aptitude for learning, a humble attitude, the ability to both lead and follow, and it doesn't hurt to be in good physical shape.  This is just a few lessons from my first week working a demanding job

Alberta Floods: an on-the-ground perspective

Before I begin, let me first say that, although I did lose some things in the flood, my home and family were perfectly safe and dry here in my community (I don't live in Calgary), and we were not personally hurt.  I've spoken to hundred of people who lost nearly everything, and most of them will never be able to get enough government help or insurance money to cover the loss.  I feel so very bad for all of those people, and I've been praying for you every day!  In Alberta, insurance does not cover flooding, obviously it would be useful, but flood insurance is very expensive, and is almost non-existent, at least for homes and cars.

On Friday, June 21st 2013, 10+ Alberta communities experienced flooding on a scale so devastating, that more than 30% of people had to be evacuated for their safety.  One town, High River, was literally emptied. No living human was permitted to remain, on threat of arrest!  It sounds drastic, but four people have already been confirmed dead, and the entire town was under water.  The whole thing.  13,000 people may have lost homes, businesses, cars, and possessions, and a few lost their lives when the surge came through.  A huge number of those homes were buried up to the roof in water, and those houses will almost certainly be torn down.  I would not be surprised if the entire town was reduced in long-term population by half or more, simply because people cannot afford to rebuild!  The idea is staggering, especially considering that High River is one of my favorite places to shop.  It has (had) a nice grocery store, farm store, and it was small enough that you can cross the entire thing in minutes.  I had friends there, who almost certainly are homeless right this second!

Well, I won't drag the "emotional" part out.  You get the picture, and it sucks no matter what angle you see it from.  Here is my perspective on flooding:

People are funny creatures.  We have access to amazing technology, we can send pictures across the world in milliseconds, speak any language with the miracle of Google Translate, and access the sum total of human knowledge from a device that fits in your pocket, yet most of us use that technology to take pictures of our food, or make duck faces in a mirror.  If I were Nikolas Tesla, who invented AC electricity, I would be clawing my way back from the grave to rampage mankind!

So, people have all this knowledge available, and yet we fail to use it.  We fail to remember that the Bow River flooded in 1902, 1929, 2005 and minor flooding in many other years besides.  We build houses, made from sawdust and glue, with some tarpaper on the outside, right next to a river that has flooded more than 3 times in the last CENTURY, and just flooded again!  Not to kick poor High River when she's down, but they JUST had a massive flood that caused major damage, perhaps 4 years ago.  They called that one a "100 year flood", as if God had some kind of sand timer, and every 100 years he floods the river, and flips it over.  That kind of arrogance means that we place buildings so close to the river, that people can walk out their back door and stand on the bank.  Even if these flood occurred exactly 100 years apart, you are practically guaranteeing that your house will be flooded!

Insurance companies understand this much better than the rest of us.  The very reason that flood insurance is so expensive, is that flooding is virtually GUARANTEED to happen.  The only people who would buy the insurance, are the very same ones who build their house right next to water that has flooded in the past, and is guaranteed to flood again.  I wouldn't sell insurance for that!

There are two kinds of flooding.  First, it rains, and rains, and rains.  The water simply cannot drain off quickly enough, and it starts stacking up, starting with the lowest level, ie, your basement.  The watershed has a natural limit to its drainage, and this exceeds that.  The flooding occurs in all low lying areas, but everyone gets a little taste of it, either in your basement, blocked storm drains, or leaky roofs.  The biggest danger is in cities with lots of collection area, and lots of hills.  The storm water starts barrelling through, and ends up blasting out manhole covers, flooding underpasses, or causing mudslides.
Then, you have flooding caused by someone else's rain.  In Alberta, it only rained 36 mm in Calgary, but more than 140 mm in the mountains, which are the highest point.  The water flows through the watershed in a "surge" and reaches the lowest level, ie, the basement of my office in downtown Calgary (true story).  By that time, it has collected so much extra glop, that it resembles a mudslide, and leaves a 4 inch layer of silt when it leaves!

In "primitive" times, people did their farming, and planting on these flood plains.  When the rivers flooded, the silt brought all kinds of minerals and nutrients, building fertility.  It's no secret that flood plains are the most fertile land in the world.  The main difference today, is that we now build houses on those same floodplains.  I would like to suggest that this might be foolish, when combined with the following other facts: we have all kinds of technology to prevent flood water from entering our homes, and we aren't using ANY of it!  The Netherlands was actually built on reclaimed seabed.  Something like 40% of the land is below sea level, and is held back by dikes.  Vancouver has built a kind of "seawall" around some of it's more vulnerable areas to protect from flood waters.  We are capable of constructing dams that can hold massive amounts of water and last for a century.  We can divert rivers, stop them up, or widen them.  But, we didn't, and we paid the price!  $100,000,000 in damage so far, and almost certainly many, many times that.  A permanent flood wall may have cost $10,000,000, and would have been worth every penny.
Even temporary solutions seemed to have been ignored:
Many companies are selling a long rubber tube that can be filled with water, and braced in place to nearly block all flood waters.  Other products include lightweight sandbags that absorb 20 times their weight in water, and can be stacked in minutes by one person.  Placed around vulnerable doors and windows, $200 worth of these "sandbags" can prevent water from infiltrating into a basement, and could save the homeowner untold thousands.

I should probably quit while I'm ahead...after all, I deliberately left personal belongings inside my office KNOWING that it was at risk of flooding.  It was only a couple small items, shoes etc, but I could have easily moved them.  I simply didn't believe that the river could possibly get that high.

I have learned my lesson, Creator.  I will never be so arrogant again.  I hope that none of us will.

POSTSCRIPT

I would like to send some virtual High Fives to some heroes who showed real love to their neighbors, even putting their own lives in danger:

Cochrane Fire Dept - Not sure how you guys can even walk with those balls of steel, but you literally saved people lives, at the huge risk of your own!  Wading into deep moving water is usually pretty inadvisable, but with no thought to your own lives, you saved many more.

High River RCMP/Sheriffs - 48 hours of hell, and it's still going.  Good work, again, you literally saved lives, and you've watched your own homes disintegrate as well...

Calgary Civilians - Those people who the first thing they asked me, is "Where can I volunteer to help?"  Mr Pond, Mr Hallett, your selfless attitudes are commendable.

Regular people with Couches - And, who offered those couches to the people displaced, no matter where they were from, and who they were!

Mayor Nenshi, City of Calgary - I got the distinct impression that you really cared about your city, and you kept everyone informed.  That kind of devotion surely cost you something that you didn't have to give, and sets you apart from other politicians.

Calgary Fire/EMS/CPS/Transit - You did your job, and you did it well, even when your own homes were certainly at risk.  Like me, I'm sure most of you wish you could have done more, but none of us knew that it would get THAT BAD!!!

I know that so many have done so much, and sorry that I didn't mention you, but you know who you are!

Easy Soapmaking For Lazy People Who Don't Like to Stir

Easy Soapmaking For Lazy People Who Don't Like to Stir
AKA "Hot Process Oven Process"

Many soap recipes, in fact, most of them, tell you to cook the soap on your stove, which requires some stirring, more stirring, stirring again, and just when you think you're done, keep stirring bud!  The whole point of stirring is to speed the chemical reactions, and make sure that it completes evenly.  It also ensures that the heat is evenly transferred to all of the mixture, and if you aren't using a double boiler, ensures that you don't burn or scorch your soap!

Some people like the stirring, because it really feels like you're "making" something.  I don't.  I have things to do, and when I first made soap with olive oil, it took 45 minutes to bring the mixture to "trace", which is the point at which the chemical reaction begins.  It splashed everywhere, and I was basically glued to the stove, mixing with a stick blender.

Not any more!  Someone clever, and perhaps a little lazy, has discovered that soap can be just as easily cooked in the OVEN, as it can on the stove top!  Plus, it requires pretty much zero stirring, only once every half hour or so to get things going.  Here's how it works.

Hot Process Oven Process Soap Making

1.  Set your oven to 175 F.  Most recipes will cook just fine at this temp, and it will (mostly) prevent soap from boiling over.  The first time I tried this, I set the stove at 225, but this is too high, and my soap did boil over.  Nice mess, and it was not much fun to clean up!

2.  Mix your oils, melt any solid oils, and stir in your lye mixture.  This will work for liquid (Potassium Hydroxide) or bar soap (Sodium Hydroxide).  Give it a minute of initial stir, just to get things going.

3.  Put your non-aluminum, oven safe container into the oven with a lid on top, and leave it for 1/2 hr.

4.  After the first half hour, a minute of blending with a stick blender will bring an immediate trace, check on the pot every 1/2 after that for about 3 hours.  The last hour, I usually let it sit without too much stirring.  It will get to a very thick, mostly translucent stage that seems like vaseline.  This is pretty much the end, but you can test it by dissolving a bit in water to see if all the fatty acids are reacted away.  The water will be pretty clear if the reaction is complete.

5.  Moving quickly, spoon the mixture into your mold, and let it cool.  Once cooled at bit, it can be unmolded, and cut into bars.  It will be easier to unmold than cold process soap, and is ready to use immediately!

At some point in the future, I will be switching to a number of large slow cookers, which will accomplish about the same as an oven, but it will be easier to check on and stir.